First of Many Five

It occurs to me sometimes when I'm endlessly traversing teh interwebs that computers have almost entirely replaced books in the past 5 years of my life.

Paranoia creeps with this awareness: I was a straight A student with high ambitions!  I got an A+ on a paper about motherfucking Nietzsche!  Am I now, in my late 20s, wasting my life, ignoring my world, becoming a mindless, 120wpm typing, lolz kitteh obsessed, facebook stalking, kitsch sucking, tried-to-overlook-twitter-but-simply-could-not-god-damn-it, cafe haunting hipster zombie potato?

Or is this unceasing barrage of information actually nourishing my life, expanding my world, keeping me connected to people I otherwise would probably never talk to via the phone (puke) or snail mail (pffffffffff), offering me an encyclopedia humanica with everything I could ever hope to know or learn...

Is the internet a bold example of the potential to share a universal consciousness upon this blue and green and white and oh so pretty rock?

Is my new-found obsession with Twitter a sign of my soul's depravity and sickness?  Fuck you, it took me six years to actually start caring.  That puts me in the outer rings of hell away from you inner circle social media junkies.

In an attempt to reclaim my sense of free will and seize my destiny, I've started a blog (-2 integrity) that will catalogue 5 things that I learn from teh interwebs every day I'm on it, which is every day forever.  Actual knowledge, not another fucking insanely cute youtube clip featuring kittens on crack that can render the biggest Broseph of them all into a spirit-finger wielding ninny.

Although the initial purpose of this blog was to congratulate myself on a valiant attempt at "learning," and thus "winning," what's actually going to happen is that I'm going to become a random information encyclopedia that will kick your ass at Trivia Night. Every Night.

Boosh.

Here's what I learned today!!

1. There are more lighthouses in Michigan than any other state in the country.

It is also the country's number one producer of blueberries, tart cherries and pickling cucumbers.  3 things I could eat forever and ever. 

2. There is a mushroom that exists, in real life, called Boletus luridiformis (formally known as Boletus erythropus) that is basically rainbow colored.

You can eat them if you prepare them right and they change color (yellowish green to blue) when you slice through them.
3. Colorado lays above 1,000 meters (3,281 ft) elevation, the only state in the country to do so.

I'm pretty sure we also have the sweetest flag in the country.  In your FACE, America!

4. Transcendentalism formed as a response, one of outrage and disdain, towards the intellectualism at Harvard University.  It encouraged the use of intuition to develop a more perfect spirituality, as opposed to religious doctrine and empirical understanding.

5. Asafoetida, the dried latex gum of a ferula, is used as a digestive aid.  When raw, the spice has a repugnant aroma (giving it the names Devil's Dung and Stinking Gum) but when cooked gives off a gentle flavor of leeks.

 I never would've even heard of that if I hadn't been reading a BOOK! A cerebral titillator by mah girl Ursuala K Le Guin called The Telling.  Get it.

Alrighty.  Entry one.  Cannonballing into riiight into the bleep bloop sea of information that is the internet.  A sea that prospers with ninja kittens, gems of hilarity like hyperbole and a half  and the pandora's box that is stumble upon.

Off we go into the cybergasm that is TEH INTERWEBS!!!!